Golden oldie

Until my mid-teens I was painfully short for my age. I was 4-foot-11 in seventh grade and until I was 14 I could pass for under 12 at the movies and vacation attractions. My parents, however, wouldn't take advantage and always paid full price. My children are ages 28 and 24. I'm usually met with, "You don't look old enough to have children that old." My usual reply: "I'm not." Things are changing, however, thanks to the monster in my chest.
After radiation treatment and five hours of chemo, I stopped by a Kroger today. Wednesday. Senior discount day. I bought Gatorade, Beanee Weenees, Break-Free egg product and caramel syrup (No, I'm not pregnant). "Do you get the senior discount?" the high-schooler behind the cash register asked. Senior discount!? I'm not 60!!! I'm 49, for crying out loud. Sure, I'm covering up my bald head with a bandana, but I look more like a biker in need of a few tattoos than a senior citizen. At least that's what I'd like to think. Thanks a lot chemo. ...
P.S. I didn't say any of those things to the cashier, and I didn't take the discount. ...
Started my third cycle of chemotherapy today. My red blood cell count was low, so I got a shot of Procrit to give me a boost. I've been having dizzy spells because of the anemia. Hopefully this will help. ...
Remember the large fellow who accepted some gingerbread from me during my last chemo cycle? He walked in about three hours into my treatment today and had a seat next to me. He proceeded to turn up the volume on the TV, kick back in the recliner, fall asleep with his mouth open and snore like your bum uncle (probably your Mother's brother) on the living room couch at 2 a.m. on a Sunday. He moved about an hour later. For some reason he kept waking up. I think it was just coincidence that I kept clearing my throat every few minutes and closing my book with a loud thud after completing each chapter. Hey, there were plenty of empty chairs in the corners made just for sleeping and snoring. ...
I smell like Mary Kay tonight. Actually, I smell like a Mary Kay product. My wife's co-worker Alicia sent me a tube of Extra Emollient Night Cream to help moisturize my radiation burns. Thanks Alicia! Maybe if I used a Mary Kay facial cream I wouldn't be offered senior citizen discounts. ...
Lisa gets credit for passing along today's quote: "You don't stop laughing because you grow old. You grow old because you stop laughing." (Michael Pritchard)