Seek and destroy

I went to the mountains today. My two favorite places on the planet are mountains and beaches. I learned to drive in the mountains, and I still like "straightening the curves" as Waylon Jennings wrote. It was good to have lunch with my wife, mother, sister and brother-in-law. We don't get to do that often enough. ...
My wife and I were flipping through the TV channels (Saturday night TV is the pits I've come to find out), and came upon the ending of "The Truman Show" on TBS. She said this blog reminds her of the movie, what with my life being laid out for all to see. I took this as a positive sign a few minutes later when Jim Carrey's character withstood an assault on his life. His "creator" made the wind blow, the rain pour and he capsized his boat. He tried to kill Truman. Yet Truman survived. His boat hit the end of his "world" and he walked up the steps to a door ~ a door to freedom. His "creator," the monster cancer in my blog, told him he couldn't leave his "world." But Truman said, "In case I don't see you, 'Good afternoon, good evening and good night!' " He then stepped into freedom, leaving his monster behind. One day, I, too, will leave my monster behind. ...
Your prayers, your words of encouragement all contribute to the destruction of this monster. Thank you.

Another day

I have 16 radiation treatments behind me. Four more and I'm halfway through that treatment. ...
I'm in a better mood tonight, but my head is colder. That's because I had most of my hair shaved off (see photo below). The last time I did this was more than 30 years ago at Lackland Air Force Base, Texas. When I cranked up my car last night as I left the hair stylist, an Avacor commercial was playing on the radio. Figures. ...
If all goes well, I'll visit my mother up in the North Georgia mountains tonight. I've always thought "North Georgia mountains" was redundant because I've never seen mountains in South Georgia. Anyway, it will be my first visit since being diagnosed with cancer. It should be a good visit. ...
Thought for the day: "I don't believe in pessimism. If something doesn't come up the way you want, forge ahead. If you think it's going to rain, it will." (Clint Eastwood)

Cancer sucks

Today, for the first time, I feel like a cancer patient. Sorry to be a downer. ...
I went to my oncologist today. My white cell count is low. That was to be expected, I'm told. Nothing I could have done, diet or otherwise, to prevent it. It's the chemo. It kills cancer cells, but it also kills healthy cells. I'm at-risk for infection, so I've been given antibiotics. I'm told to contact the cancer center day or night if my body temperature reaches 100.5 or higher. I should avoid crowds. If I go to the grocery store or to a restaurant, I'm to go at off-peak hours.
I'm scheduled to start chemo again on Wednesday. They'll do a blood test beforehand. If my numbers aren't better, they might lower the dosage of chemo. They can give me shots after this next chemo cycle to help strengthen me, but that may mean stopping radiation treatments for a few days. The shots and the radiation don't mix, I'm told. ...
Oh, and I shaved my head today. Yep, I feel like a cancer patient.

Rush, rush, rush

I had a post-op appointment with my surgeon today. Everything checked out OK with my port procedure. My appointment was at 2:15 p.m., which I assumed would give me plenty of time to get to my radiation appointment at 3:30, especially since the offices are on the same hospital campus. Well, my road trip to the surgeon started off badly when there was a detour that took me about 10 minutes out of my way. Still, I got to the office at 2:17. Not bad. I sat there. And sat there. I finally saw the doctor at 3:05. He looked at my incision and told me everything looked good. I left his office at 3:09. The cancer center where I have radiation treatments is probably an eighth of a mile from my surgeon's office as the crow flies. But I'm not a crow. Because of construction and one-way streets, it took me until 3:25 to get to the parking garage. I barely made it to radiation on time. But, on time I was. After treatment, I was back in my car and felt really happy. I had an adrenaline rush. There actually was a smile on my face. The only thing I can figure is rushing to appointments reminded me of work. I felt good because I'd made deadline. ...
My mother got her CT scan results today. Seems she has a mild case of emphysema. She still has some more tests to go through, so please keep her in your prayers. ...
Today's quote: "The shortest distance between two points is under construction." (Leo Aikman). I never met Leo Aikman, but if a man can be judged by how his daughter turned out, I'm sure I would have liked him.

The best medicine

Bob Hope, 100; George Burns, 100; Milton Berle, 93. What they have in common is obvious. Male, old farts when they died and comedians. They laughed. And studies show the cliche of "Laughter is the best medicine" holds true. I am thankful for the many things my friend have done for me over the past few weeks. The most thing I'm thankful for is the laughter. A forwarded e-mail joke; a true-life story; an anecdote; anything that makes me laugh. I can tear up at the drop of a hat. A song can bring a tear to my eyes. A memory pops into my mind and brings a tear. Sometimes it's tears of joy. Other times it's tears of fear. But laughter. Well, laughter is always good. Please send laughter my way. ...
My mother gets her CAT scan results tomorrow. Please send prayers her way. ...
I'm going to lose my hair in two days. My choice. I went to my hairdresser today and made an appointment. I told her my situation and said I wanted to control when I lost my hair. "I can do that," she said. So I'll let her do just that at 6 p.m. Thursday. ...
I don't play the lottery, but if I did, I'd play these numbers for Cash 3: 3 5 9
Let me know if you win.

Heroes happen

This week: five radiation treatments, three doctor visits. A relatively light schedule considering next week I'll add three five-hour chemo treatments to my radiation and doctor visits. At least my doctor visits this week are bundled around my radiation treatments so there no split days where I have morning and afternoon appointments. ...
It's good to be back at my "normal" 3:30 p.m. radiation appointments, even if it's only for a week. In the afternoons I usually get my comfortable Room D to change into my gown and have very little waiting time before going to see Gumby (the radiation contraption) for my treatment. ...
My wife, Lynn, got some compliments at work for her "short and sassy" haircut. She should! She looks great. ...
A friend of ours is once again battling breast cancer. She has been waging war against this monster for more than 20 years. It goes away; it comes back. What strength she has. ...
Read an article in AARP magazine today about Michael J. Fox, the actor with Parkinson's disease. Here's a quote from him: "Left to my own devices, I wouldn't have been so inspiring." Almost no one asks to be a hero. It just happens. Thank God, despite what some people may say, there are still heroes out there.

Aging gracefully

While watching "The West Wing" tonight, I mentioned to my wife how the older Alan Alda gets the more he looks like my dad, who died in 2001 at age 76. Lynn commented that Alda was still a nice-looking man and she imagined I would one day look like him because I'm the spitting image of my dad. Growing old. That is a nice thought. ...
I went to church today for the first time since my diagnosis. Most people know my situation. The congregation was wonderful. No one looked at me with pity or like I was a two-headed monster. Prayer requests revealed two others were recently diagnosed with cancer. One has lung cancer that has spread to her brain. I'm convinced this monster eventually strikes every family. ...
My mother had a CT scan last week. She has been having shortness of breath. A chest X-ray didn't reveal anything. She should get the test results this week. I know I ask for a lot of prayers, and here's another request: Please pray for my mother. And please pray that Lynn and I grow old together. Thank you. ...

My wife: Short & sassy

Lynn, my wife, did it. She had her hair cut today. The stylist calls it "short and sassy." Guess I'm up next. My hair hasn't started falling out yet, but my plan is to go ahead and chop it off Friday. Buzzzzzzzz. ...
I went out for breakfast today. It was nice being around folks outside of a doctor's office. It was also a bit strange. Lynn was the only person at IHOP who knew I had cancer. I wondered how many other people there had secrets. ...
My Tennessee Vols beat No. 2 Florida in men's basketball tonight. That was a shock. Sorry boss. ...
"Cancer Sucks" was the subject line of an e-mail I received from a friend the other day. Yes, it does. But what are you going to do? Get mad at God? No. As Michelle, who is battling breast cancer, said (and I agree with), "God did not give me cancer. I got cancer and He is helping me through it." Amen!

A scar to brag about?

While not exactly magical, the $100.15 mouthwash is doing its job. The rawness in my throat is almost completely gone. ...
The bandage was taken off the incision from my port surgery today. Looks like I may have about a 1-inch scar. If so, it will be my first surgical scar. Cool. Not much to brag about, but at least now I can show off this scar instead of the one on my right index finger where a kid bit me when I was 6 years old. ...
The nurse practitioner at my internist's office wasn't happy with my blood pressure today (160/100), so she added a second BP med to my arsenal. My BP is always higher when I go to the doc's. Plus, she checked it right after taking off my bandage (see above). Still, I'll take the meds in hopes of getting the BP under control. It'll be one less thing to worry about. ...
Daniel, my son, and his girlfriend, Amanda, came over tonight after they went out to dinner. As always, it was a good visit. Amanda was encouraging. An uncle of hers was diagnosed with lung cancer two years ago. Radiation and chemo killed his monster and he's doing OK today. That is uplifting to hear. ...
I hope to get out tomorrow for something other than a doctor's appointment. Maybe breakfast at IHOP? We'll see. ...
Today's thought: If people from Poland are called Poles, what do you call people from Germany?

The high cost of magic

I got my "magic mouthwash" today. At $100.15 a bottle, it better be real magic. I'm talking Harry Potter-type magic, no pull-a-rabbit-out-of-the-hat tricks. ...
Tomorrow begins early with a trip to my internist and ends with a late-afternoon visit to radiation. It will be a long day, but I caught about two extra hours of sleep last night and snuck in a nap today, so maybe I won't get too worn out. I'm eating well, but still get tired and sleepy. Anybody have any ideas on how some light exercise might help build my stamina? I started drinking ProSure today, a supplement that is supposed to build muscle. We'll see if that helps. ...
My son came over for lunch between his work shifts today. He's a hard worker. He and his girlfriend are visiting Friday night. It will be good to see them together. We all get along real well. She and my wife, Lynn, share the same political views, but that's a whole other blog. ...
As for the hair ... Lynn is thinking of cutting hers really short (but not shaved) this weekend as a show of support. I'm thinking of waiting one more week before getting a "buzz cut" and shaving my beard. Maybe I'll post before-and-after photos. ...
I heard from co-workers today, which is always wonderful. Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers. ...
I'm embracing this thought today: I cried when I had no shoes, until I saw a man who had no feet.